Wednesday 7 November 2007

...and it hurt like hell


He called me this morning. I didn't think he would. He asked me go out to dinner with him on Friday. I wonder if we'll make dinner this time or if we'll end up pulling each others clothes off before the starters arrive... Oh happy thought!


I should to talk to him properly though. I know I'm avoiding it but I need ask him about last time.


The last time I waited for him to call was the most frustrating time of my life. I left a message on his voicemail and he didn't return my call. For days I had convinced myself that there had to be a good explanation for it. I constantly checked my phone messages and my email inbox hoping for some kind of response. I never spent more two minutes on the phone with anyone just in case he was trying to call.


It finally hit me that he never intended to see or speak to me again and it hurt like hell. I kept replaying our night together and tried to figure out what I did wrong. Maybe he didn't like my lacy underwear. Maybe I he didn't like my perfume. I finally confided in a friend who told me that some guys just move on after having sex with a girl and that I just had to deal with it. At the time it broke my heart. The only reason that I had done anything with him was because we had a strong connection. We couldn't keep our hands off each other. We spent hours talking and kissing surely it meant something to him didn't it?


I was really young and naive last time. I had no idea how adult relationships worked. I've grown up alot since and formed my own opinions through experience. Although I've agreed to see him on Friday I must remember to tread carefully... Though, its easier said then done with the first guy you fell for!


Today is fairly quiet considering there's quite a big meeting tomorrow. Bimbo and the rest of Admin have the tedious job of calling all attendees and confirming their arrival, printing out booklets, and battling with the caterers. Scruffy Artist and Stoner are just finishing off the visual edits and stills. Old Prick has taken the day off as holiday (I guess he needs to use them up before he gets flung out of the door tomorrow). And Gay Boss is ill again. I'm avoiding Accounts because I really don't want to speak to Preppy.


I think I'll continue to spend the day sitting at my desk pondering....

10 comments:

Belle said...

"it hurt like hell". How appropriate those words are to discribe the first.. well, anything, really, coming back into your life. I enjoyed reading this blog. Keep it up!

whatagem said...

Thanks for the pop in on my blog! I really just love all these b&w photos---Bette Davis is one of my faves along with Hepburn. Whatever happen to the classy actresses of those times?

Kat Mortensen said...

Go out with someone else in the meantime.

Stop by Poetikat's and pick up some meme info...I want to know more about you Elise. ha ha.

Kat

Kat Mortensen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cindy Breninger said...

Hehe, your blog always makes me smile! :)
Cindy
www.adayinthelifeofcindy.blogspot.com

Daszzle said...

Hope it works out for you chica

linda said...

Memories, heartache, longing - the things we subject ourselves to in life. Hard not to though isn't it when something feels so good.

Anonymous said...

As you ponder, I get ready to fly the coop!

~~And, I just found you too!

**
Don't worry,
I'll be a dedicated reader,
and, love you, from afar.

**
farewell, Elise...

You'll survive, with laughter & love, on your side.

see you at "bottomsUp!"(sometimes)

`x~Will.

Jeff said...

Nice one yet again!
Once I had this amazing night with this stunning girl, it was quite a few years back, but it was electric! So great in fact that it was the reason I never called back! I was naive and young and in that "Good Will Hunting" mindset, I mean I was perfect, she was perfect, didnt want to ruin that.
Oh what strange creatures we can be huh?

Elise said...

Adam, is this an excuse for guys to never call: "it was just too perfect I didn't want to ruin it"

I'm not buying...