Wednesday 23 January 2008

Dental Plan


I had breakfast with Stoner and Bimbo this morning.


We decided to meet at Granny's for a Full English Breakfast. By the time I got there Bimbo was sitting on the edge of the pavement outside heaving into the sewage drain. (The smell of crispy bacon doesn't agree with her anymore).


Being such a sensitive person Bimbo cried her eyes out for "ruining everything". She didn't mean to cause a scene but her raging hormones were attracting attention and sleazy smiles from the greasy men inside the cafe. I was desperate to leave and I practically dragged her away as she sobbed.


I called Stoner and told him to meet us at Costa instead.


Over muffins, lattes, cappuccinos and hot chocolates the three of us discussed work. Bimbo recently found out that our dental plan is going to be withdrawn soon. We're all going to be compensated with a salary bonus next month. I'm not too bothered about the dental plan. My teeth are fine and I've only ever used it to get them professionally cleaned. I'll probably put the bonus towards redecorating the bedroom.


Bimbo and Stoner seem a little more distressed about it than I was.

Stoner has fillings that need to be looked after. Well, he shouldn't smoke so much then should he? Stoner smokes about 20 cigarettes a day. And that's not including his spliffs. No wonder he has holes in his teeth!


Bimbo has a slightly more dramatic problem.


"Will bad teeth harm my baby's health?"


Stoner and I looked at each other.


"You're teeth are fine. And even if they were slightly damaged I doubt it will harm your baby."


"But what about its teeth?"


"What?"


"My teeth were wonky before I had braces! And I've kept mine so nice since, so that the baby has nice teeth too!"


I let Stoner answer this one.


"I don't think a dental plan will alter your baby's teeth."


Sometimes Bimbo can be so strange! I really don't know where she gets information.

23 comments:

Polgara said...

I dont think i've ever wanted to meet anyone as much as i want to meet Bimbo after reading that!
Priceless :0)

The Divine Miss M said...

She's a special girl your Bimbo isn't she? hehehe

Reminds me of the Friends episode where Rachels sister says that she had a nose job so that her child doesn't inherit her horrible nose. HAHHAHAHAH

Stupid people can be really endearing though ;)

Ruby said...

ha ha ha ha ha ha.....*trying to regain profesionalism at the office*

what on earht is going on in that girl's head???

Polgara said...

Bit worried that you think Husband would like a condom when we trying for a baby......

Polgara said...

Ha ha let you off then!

Kitty said...

I have sympathy with Bimbo over the hurling thing - when I was pregnant with No.2 the slightest smell of cooking food was enough to send me running for the loo. :-(

Bless her on the issue of her child's teeth though - maybe she should read a book on pregnancy? ;-) x

Casdok said...

Love it!!

Bharat said...

I don't see why a dental plan is all that important anyway... brush twice a day for god's sake!!

Michelle Hix said...

We love Bimbo!

Verdant Earl said...

She's got a bit o' Jessica Simpson in her, eh?

Bruce Johnson said...

I think your name for her sort of sums it up. Besides, pregnant women are not known to be the most level headed.

Malach the Merciless said...

Ugh, oral cleanliness it related to heart disease, I would go on strike

Sweets said...

i once heard about a woman that was hysterical when her baby was born the doc made a joke and said... you're baby's fine only thing is it has no teeth... wmahahahah... she thought baby was supp to be born with teeth...

Slyde said...

She definitely reminds me of Jessica Simpson, as well...

Haylzc5 said...

I would prefer to money, that way you can buy teeth if you need to !! haha

Hayley x

A Girl, A Boy, and Me said...

Did you tell her if she wears colored contacts she can determine the color of her child's eyes?

Kat Mortensen said...

Poor Bimbo! You've just got to love her.
Kat

Chickie said...

LMAO @ a girl, a boy, and me!

Poor, worried, Bimbo.

FreeOscar said...

It's really sweet, but strange idea of hers.

roentare said...

It is actually true that bad teeth potentially cause complications in babies like endocarditis or mental retardation. So association with bad temperament of babies are also documented.

Bad teeth shapes, however, are not implicated with health of babies. Only in Chinese folk beliefs...

KaB said...

Lol...she sounds like a hoot!

Dental upkeep is expensive yo...I'd be sad to say goodbye to a dental plan! I wish I had one now!

good, healthy teeth = easier to look at the person without sighing in disgust! I hate ugly teeth! Blah...

The Ponderer said...

*sobs like Bimbo but about not being linked yet.* =P

I haven't commented you recently! I'm glad your trip went well.

Dental insurance is overrated, even though I don't have the best of teeth. =/

Cocaine Princess said...

Since I started reading your posts I have been mentally picturing what each character looks like in particular Bimbo. I knew she reminded me of someone but just couldn't put my finger on it until today and someone mentioned Jessica Simpson- that's it! I just thought of another person:
I'm quite sure you remember the US comedy show called THE NANNY with Fran Drescher. Well her character's fiance dumps her and marries Fran's
enemy named Heather Biblow, played by Pam Anderson. Her character was portrayed as a busty, gum-chewing, dim-witted bimbo.

XOXOXOXO,
Cocaine Princess